The New York City Department of Education has been infected with a new, highly deadly, antimoronic-resistant strain of the political correctness bug.

Effective immediately, any term that might offend any religious group has been banned from tests administered to students by the city.

It includes anything pertaining to literally anything prior to when creationists believe the earth was created. That means all teaching on climate modelling, geography, most of physics, most of chemistry, all of biology and human movement, all of cultural and sociology studies – basically all of the subjects that make school fun and interesting – are out.

Also outlawed are any mentions of the term ‘birthday’ (Jehovah’s Witnesses don’t believe in them), voting (also a no-no for J-Dubs), dancing and Halloween (due to their supposedly ‘Pagan origin’), also class identifying terms like ‘poverty’ or ‘wealth’, and ‘scary’ subjects like terrorism, disease or divorce.

While not explicitly stated on any of the source articles, I’d assume they’re also removing several colours from the spectrum of visible light, to avoid offending anyone with colour-blindness. They should also ban books, because this might offend anyone with a learning disability.

All students should also have plastic and orthopaedic surgery so that everyone is of a single homogenous phenotype. Thus no one will be taller or shorter than anyone else, all will have the same bone structure and skin, eye and hair colour, no one girl will be more perky than anyone else and to ensure that there is no bullying disparity, all students should be punched in the face at the beginning of school – this should also help making students complicit enough in learning the anachronism of creation.

In New York City, political correctness has apparently ceased being about preventing the marginalised from being intentionally targeted, and become a way to ensure that these children are completely unprepared for tertiary study. This is an attempt at homogeny and mediocrity.

“But it’s only in tests!”

Indeed, it is only in tests, but examinations are structured to test your attentiveness throughout the semester. If you fail the exam, it is due to a lack of understanding of the curriculum; thus you are tested on what you are taught and taught what you are tested on.

So writing this off as a benign act to prevent people from ‘freaking-out’ during testing is inappropriate. If you deny evolution and you’re in a biology class, you’ll fail; to pass on the basis that certain questions are withheld, is like drinking water, but telling everyone it’s vodka and acting drunk. If you don’t want to be taught things that contravene or contradict YOUR reality, be home schooled.

Here are a couple of ImaginaryFriendsShow.com preferred headlines for you:

NY Schools to ban teaching of dinosaurs to avoid upsetting creationists; all animals displaying 10k years of domestication to be culled immediately.

NY Schools to ban teaching of dinosaurs to avoid upsetting creationists; assassination of students with IQ above 80 to follow.

NY Schools to ban teaching of dinosaurs to avoid upsetting creationists; schools to also remove all ‘sharp things’ from cafeterias.

NY Schools to ban teaching of dinosaurs to avoid upsetting creationists; all Hindu’s to be reprimanded for ‘cosmic egg’ belief.

NY Schools to ban teaching of dinosaurs to avoid upsetting creationists; Buddha statues and texts to be destroyed for reincarnation belief.

NY Schools to ban teaching of dinosaurs to avoid upsetting creationists; Ray Comfort to be made king.

NY Schools to ban teaching of dinosaurs to avoid upsetting creationists; Geography classes to be changed to ‘Flat Earth’ class.

NY Schools to ban teaching of dinosaurs to avoid upsetting creationists; unicorns to be officially recognised as real animal.

Source.