Koran Curious – Bonus interview with CJ Werleman

Dear Pod People,

We sat down with CJ Werleman, author of God Hates You, Hate Him Back and Jesus Lied – He was only human; on his latest and greatest book, Koran Curious.

Watch here:

Download MP3 here.

Masticate in public, everybody’s doing it!


Jake is the author of ‘Letters to Christian Leaders; Hollow be thy claims’, the book which takes the specific claims that the most prominent Christian Leaders make and directly refutes them using the latest research and evidence, reason, logic, and a dash of snarky humour. Get it here for your sexy kindleOr if you prefer the authenticity of a book (and are too cheap for a kindle) get the hardcopy here.

God, The Bible and Religion: all figments of a drug-fuelled imagination

I have often pondered the possibility that the story of a senior citizen finding resources for and building an arc of unimaginable proportions, then filling it with two of each animal, or Noah’s Arc might seem more believable if I were extremely, impossibly high on drugs. Now, Professor Benny Shanon of Jerusalem University has written of his theory that the biblical Israelites were high while they wrote their stories.

The thunder, lightning and blaring of a trumpet which the Book of Exodus says emanated from Mount Sinai were probably just have been the imaginings of a people in an altered state of awareness, Professor Shanon hypothesised, writing in the British Journal Time and Mind.

Anyone who has travelled deep into the jungles of South America and conversed with a tribal Shaman and been persuaded to try the intense hallucenogen, ayahuasca, can attest to the profound and elegant closeness to the universe it provides. A plant with the same qualities as one used in the ayahuasca brew has been revered by Jews in the region as having magical and curative powers.

This plant, readers, is commonly found around the Middle East, but most notably, on Mount Siani. That’s right boys and girls, when Moses met God for the first time, he was high, so high in fact that it took him forty days to come down… from the mountain.

So, riddle me this; have you ever gotten toked or tripped your way to heaven and written some seriously profound poetry, the kind that might change the world, then the next morning, awake with the same feelings of elation and read the garbled mess of semi passable prose that was your ticket to martyrdom and had it shunned?

Doesn’t it sound more likely that this is what transpired on the Siani; Moses mistook a commonly found herb used for tea and garnish for the hallucinogen, got profoundly high, talked to god (who was actually a talking burning bush (which was actually a small rodent)), wrote down what god said and walked back down the mountain with a satisfied grin on his face.

Then, he would have presented his writings to his peers, who would have laughed at and ridiculed him. Then, Moses, in a giant hissy fit, smashed the tablets on the ground and walked away in a huff. Then, incomprehensibly pissed off with his mates, got high again and talked shit about them, how they were worshipping idols and coveting other peoples wives.

How could he have known that his drug-fuelled, jive talking rant would go triple platinum?

So, there you have it, the Bible, God and stone tablets, were all written while profoundly high. It’s all a sham, a drug fuelled, garbled, rambling sham… no wonder the Christians rewrote it, it didn’t make any frickin sense!

Good night, and [drug-fuelled imaginary] God bless.


Jake is the author of ‘Letters to Christian Leaders; Hollow be thy claims’, the book which takes the specific claims that the most prominent Christian Leaders make and directly refutes them using the latest research and evidence, reason, logic, and a dash of snarky humour. Get it here for your sexy kindleOr if you prefer the authenticity of a book (and are too cheap for a kindle) get the hardcopy here.

Episode 55 – Science and sh*t compels you!

Dear Garden Gnome Make-up Artist and Garden Gnome Make-up Artist Enthusiasts,

To err is human, to purr is divine… whatever that means.

This week, Gregg Savage, the Savage-G and I got together to speak into microphones and try to articulate our thoughts… and shit. And discuss shit, we did.

Defence of marriage act; Norwegian extremist-christian; Sharia in Australia; sex in the streets; cannabis; DADT; and everything else. Enjoy!

Listen hear (that was a pun, ok):

Download here.

Go masticate in public!


Jake is the author of ‘Letters to Christian Leaders; Hollow be thy claims’, the book which takes the specific claims that the most prominent Christian Leaders make and directly refutes them using the latest research and evidence, reason, logic, and a dash of snarky humour. Get it here for your sexy kindleOr if you prefer the authenticity of a book (and are too cheap for a kindle) get the hardcopy here.

Curious about the Koran? Check out Koran Curious!

CJ Werleman is no stranger to critically analysing and providing meaningful, yet delightfully sarcastic, commentary on the works of the Old and New Testament. His books, God Hates You, Hate Him Back, which was a book-by-book analysis of the best selling and least read book in the world, the Bible. The book was an instant classic and mandatory reading for all atheists and agnostics.

In his second book, Jesus Lied, He Was Only Human, CJ ripped apart the New Testament, and proved one and for all, that the Jesus of the Bible is little more than a heavily embellished, highly fictionalised character with multiple personality disorder… did I mention he was also a liar?

Nonetheless, CJ is back with another blockbuster, but this time targeting the world’s most reactionary religion, Islam.

Koran Curious is, in typical CJ style, a critical and contextual analysis of the Muslim Holy Book, the Koran. For those of you who’ve ever tried to read the Koran, which I’ve previously described as “literary chloroform,” CJ keeps the horribly laborious Holy Book palatable with liberal amounts of wit and sarcasm.

Better still; the book actually starts off with a rather evocative – possibly even romantic – tale of Mohammad’s rise to supremacy. In doing so, and without giving too much away, CJ places the origins of Islam in the perfect context to analyse the text of the horrible Koran. Placing the book in its original context allows the reader to understand the remainder of the book, which is a Sura by Sura analysis.

By the end of the book (again, trying not to give too much away) you will see just how far removed Islam is from its roots. It no longer resembles, even slightly, the religion that an illiterate camel harder started all those years ago.

On the day that the book was released, today, I sat down with CJ to talk about the book, here is what he had to say.

Jake: In the foreword, you make the statement that Islamic extremists are wilfully ignorant of the historical context behind the scriptures of the Koran, as are most Muslims. Explain this?

CJ: Well, from my own anecdotal experience, having lived in the World’s most populous Muslim country, Indonesia, for the past decade, it is evident an overwhelming majority of Muslims I speak to have only a superficial understanding of Muhammad’s biography. While most are knowledgeable of various scriptures contained within the Koran, very few can explain what each respective verse means in the context of the issues, conflicts, pressures that Muhammad faced. This is further illustrated when you hear terrorist organizations cite passages from the Koran as justification for either anti-Semitism, mistreatment of women, or waging Holy war. In that sense, extremists are either wilfully ignorant of the Koran’s historical context or they’ve intentionally miscommunicated it for their own purposes. While the latter reason seams plausible, it appears to be the former when you read a bunch of, let’s say, Bin Ladens’ or Zawahiri’s communications.

 Jake: Can you give one or two illustrations?

CJ:  Well, there are many, but one such example can be found in the second chapter (sura) that, when read in isolation, appears to be Muhammad endorsing warfare during the holy month of Ramadan. The particular verse is 2:217:

“They ask you about war in the holy month. Tell them: “To fight in that month is a great sin. But a greater sin in the eyes of God is to hinder people away from the way of God, And not believe in Him.”

Despite this passage’s somewhat ambiguity, it was recited by Muhammad shortly after his exile to Medina. The Meccans were determined to kill Muhammad and his Muslim believers, and the only means of survival the Muslims had at their disposal was to lay siege on their enemy’s relatively unprotected caravans. This verse refers to the very first time Muhammad ordered such an attack, but in doing so, he gave two specific orders. First, wait until the Holy month had passed. Second, do not kill anyone, as this will result in vendettas. Well, his men failed to obey both his instructions and Muhammad was greatly aggrieved. In turn, he prayed to Allah for guidance, and this verse is, as claimed by Muhammad, God’s reply. The key part of the reply being, “To fight in that month is a great sin!”

A further example that opponents of Islam (and I count myself as one because I am philosophically opposed to all religions equally) will cite passages to demonstrate the Koran promotes anti-Semitism, as demonstrated in Sam Harris’ End of Faith, whereby he quotes Koran 2:65, “And certainly you know of those who exceeded the limits of the Sabbath, so we said to them, “Be you apes, despised.” And then later adding his commentary, “On almost every page, the Koran instructs observant Muslims to despise non-believers.”

Now, if you read the Koran in the same manner as you read the Bible, then absolutely Harris offers a fair judgment, and one I’ve been guilty of executing. However, when you study Muhammad’s life, you begin to understand why he said the things he said. In this particular instance, for example, Muhammad was referring specifically to ONE particular Jewish tribe in Medina, who he had exiled. After fleeing for his life to Medina, Muhammad looked forward to working with the Jews and Christian community there as he regarded them as equal “Peoples of the Book”, but the Jewish tribe of that city made a backdoor pact with the Meccans, who continued to attack the Muslims, agreeing they would join forces with the Quraysh should they lay siege on Medina. As per the rules of military engagement in Arabia at that time, Muhammad had every right to order the execution of the Jewish tribe, but instead sent them packing and on their way. Thus the words cited in the Koran demonstrate his disappointment with that one particular tribe and not the entire Jewish people.

Jake: I believe your fans will be surprised by what I think is a very even-handed approach, and maybe what is a little uncharacteristic of CJ Werleman, in explaining the Koran. How will you respond to those who may accuse you of being somewhat of an Islamic apologist?

CJ: Well, they’d be mistaken. I’m as much a fan of Islam as I am of Scientology or evangelical Christianity, or any movie that Nicholas Cage is in. In an upside-down kind of way, this book’s objective is similar to that of, ‘God Hates You. Hate Him Back’. In that book I set out to show that the God of the Bible, as illustrated in the Good Book, is not the cuddly sentient being of love and forgiveness that Christians believe. But is, in fact, a genocidal, xenophobic, homophobe who is ok with the rape of women and the subjugation of slaves. The objective of ‘Koran Curious’ is similarly contrarian. In other words, I demonstrate that the Koran isn’t the big scary handbook for war that many Islamists and those in the West believe it to be. As such, I didn’t want my typically anti-theistic bullying approach to detract from the content of this book, so that it would reach a wider audience. In particular, I believe this to be a book that is not only red meat for atheists, but is equally fascinating for Jews, Christians, and Muslims alike.

Jake:  Without giving too much of the book away, tell us a little about the man Muhammad.

CJ: I believe my readers will walk away from this book thinking, “Wow! He was a remarkable fella.” And he was. The story of Muhammad is a fascinating one, and it makes for a great screenplay. He was born into a family of modest wealth. As a child, he was passed from one parental guardian to another. Starting his adulthood as a camel driver, he eventually worked his way to becoming a prominent and respected figure within the city of Mecca. During these years, he became increasingly troubled by various societal ills, such as gambling, unfair business practices, mistreatment of women and the poor, materialism, and so forth. In his forties, he claimed to have been chosen by God to lead the pagan Arabs towards following the laws of the biblical God. Shortly after he became a pariah within his own town and eventually he fled for his life. In the years that followed he had to raise an army to defend himself and the early Muslims from an enemy, Mecca, who were determined to kill him. Eventually, leading the Muslims in more than sixty military campaigns, his battle strategies were, undoubtedly, ahead of his time. Ultimately, Muhammad would unite the entire Arabian Peninsular, ending hundreds of years tribal fighting that had become the characteristic of Arabia in the seventh century. Moreover, I believe readers will be surprised to learn that Muhammad was a revolutionary for women, affording them rights of divorce and inheritance, hundreds of years before other societies.

Jake: OK. So what can you tell us about the Koran?

CJ: Once you have a complete portrait of Muhammad, the Koran starts to make sense, whereas reading the Muslim Holy Book in isolation has little or no meaning if you don’t understand the historical context. In this sense, and I’m clearly biased, I believe ‘Koran Curious’ is the first book that holds up Muhammad’s biography against the chapters and verses of the Koran.

Jake: What are some examples of misconceptions the West has about the Koran?

CJ: Literally, there are so many. Equally, Muslims have misconceptions about their own faith, as do Christians of theirs. Specific examples include the veiling of women, 72 virgins in heaven, apostasy, the meaning of Jihad and martyrdom, anti-Semitism, among others.

 Jake: What do you see to be the main issues that Islam faces in reconciling itself with Western democratic values?

CJ: To start with, the Koran was recited in the seventh century during a period of tribal barbarism. It would never have occurred to Muhammad, even in his wildest dreams, that Islam would have more than 1.5 billion followers in the twenty-first century. At the time Muhammad recited most of the Koran, the Muslims were facing the likelihood they’d be exterminated by Mecca. So the words of the Koran have a certain desperation and urgency to them. As such, the religion has never undertaken a Christian church like reformation. Nor has it any central authority, like the Church and the Pope. Generally, those that speak for Islam today are those with the greatest number of followers. Put another way, if Islam was Twitter, Lady Gaga would be its spiritual leader. Moreover, those Islamic clerics with the greatest number of followers are, generally, the ones with the most radical views, because the most radical grab the most attention. (Think Glenn Beck and FOX News!)

Jake: Speaking of FOX and the radical right wing of American politics, you make mention in the foreword that Conservative ideologues and certain special interest groups perpetuate the fear of Islam. Please explain this?

CJ: I cover this in some depth at the start of the book. In short, the right wing loves to drive the fear of an external enemy, as it moves their base. In other words, data shows the fear of an external enemy drives white Christian voters to the polls, and when white Christian voters are mobilized, they, invariably, vote Republican. That’s a very simplistic snapshot for now, but as I mentioned, I do tie topical issues like ground-zero mosques and the like to those with interests in keeping America afraid.

Koran curious is available HERE FOR KINDLE, and HERE FOR PAPERBACK.

Go masticate in public!


Jake is the author of ‘Letters to Christian Leaders; Hollow be thy claims’, the book which takes the specific claims that the most prominent Christian Leaders make and directly refutes them using the latest research and evidence, reason, logic, and a dash of snarky humour. Get it here for your sexy kindleOr if you prefer the authenticity of a book (and are too cheap for a kindle) get the hardcopy here.


Dear Strange Bedfellows,

Who would’ve guessed that plucking my monobrow would enable me to be taken seriously as a broadway makeup artist?! Nonetheless, while plucking away indiscriminately, I found a copy of the 54th ImaginaryFriendsShow.com Podcast… how do you like them apples?

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To avoid hearing about the debt ceiling crisis. Yeah, I went there! Rudy Rudell and I discuss testing anal dilation for gay priests (seriously), Rick Perry,  Catholics tired of Catholicism and skeptical problems in skeptic town.

Watch here:

Subscribe on iTunes here.

Download mp3 here.

Go masticate in public!


Jake is the author of ‘Letters to Christian Leaders; Hollow be thy claims’, the book which takes the specific claims that the most prominent Christian Leaders make and directly refutes them using the latest research and evidence, reason, logic, and a dash of snarky humour. Get it here for your sexy kindleOr if you prefer the authenticity of a book (and are too cheap for a kindle) get the hardcopy here.

Australia No.1 for Sinning. I’m so proud!

An interesting and utterly hilarious study, conducted by Focus, a UK magazine, has found that Australia is ranked number 1 in the world for committing one of the ‘seven deadly sins’ as detailed in the book of rambling desert nomads, the bible.

That’s right, Australians, when compared with the 35 other countries in the study, were ranked at the top of most of the categories, so I thought we should examine them.

Lust – Totally, we Aussies bloody love sex! But sex doesn’t sum up ‘lust’; lust is a desire best described as sexual attraction. So in order to commit this sin, you only need to look at an attractive member of the opposite or same sex and find them desirable. I’m afraid to say that everyone I’ve ever met, from every country I’ve ever visited is guilty of this crime. To say that one country ranks above another is suggests a total lack of insight into sociology and psychology.

Gluttony – Totally, Aussies love to eat and drink to excess! While 52% of Australians are clinically obese (with a Body Mass Index of over 30), this only equates to about 10-15 million Aussies (Australia’s total population c. 25 million). If you travel to the USA, over 1/3rd of Americans are morbidly obese (Body Mass Index of over 40) which equates to more than 102 MILLION FATTIES! I dare say that Australia is a drop in a rather largish ocean!

Greed – Totally, we Aussies love our possessions. But greed isn’t actually defined as ‘having lots of crap’ greed is more accurately, ‘wanting lots of crap’. If we’ve learned anything from the Global Financial Crisis, Australia was one of the few developed nations that managed to float above the oceans of debt that engulfed and just about sunk the rest of the world. Worst hit were, of course, the UK, where this study was published, and the USA, where the GFC actually originated. The GFC was the result of a greed which the strongly regulated finance sector of Australia was all but immune to.

Sloth – Totally, Aussies are f*cking lazy! Well, actually, I think that they’ve got me here. Sure I run marathons and consider myself fairly proactive in my job; I am as lazy as an old dog in the afternoon sun! You could say that we’re ambassadors for the first law of Thermodynamics, the Law of Conservation of Mass. In our defence though, in Australia, it’s either f*cking hot, or f*cking cold, so staying still is usually a pretty intelligent option.

Wrath – Revenge is a dish best served cold and we Aussies totally are a heavy handed bunch. That said, we’re mostly easy going, we just enjoy a bit of too and fro. Where else in the world could you punch your best mate in the face in one motion, then with the next order a beer for him? (Joking, we’re not all violent). In all seriousness though, we Aussies are one of the most easy going stereotypes in the civilised world. We’re far cooler than the snooty French, far more laid back than the up-tight and anal Americans, and far more relaxed than the stiff-upper-lip British.

Envy and pride – sure, whatever. Envy and pride are the most stupid of the Christian thought crimes. Both of these ‘sins’ are the at the root of most people’s motivations to do anything. We see what other people have and we want it, so we strive for it, in spite of our meagre means. Of course, we could throw in with the stupid tradition of prayer and ask for help for our mystical overlord who hasn’t done anything to further humanity since arbitrarily raping (shit, I mean impregnating through Immaculate Conception) some Jewish chick 2000 years ago.

So there you have it Nations, Australia is the most sinful nation in the world, but only because we enjoy thinking about sex whilst eating a hamburger on a couch after we saw a really sexually attractive person eating it, so we knocked them out and stole it. Whilst we knew we should have apologised, our pride got the better of us, so we just ate another hamburger instead.

In the grand scheme of things, an international campaign advertising us as the most sinful nation in the world, would, I think, go a long way to get people to come and visit. “Come to Australia, where sinning is only natural!”

Peace Nation.

Jake is the author of ‘Letters to Christian Leaders; Hollow be thy claims’, the book which takes the specific claims that the most prominent Christian Leaders make and directly refutes them using the latest research and evidence, reason, logic, and a dash of snarky humour. Get it here for your sexy kindleOr if you prefer the authenticity of a book (and are too cheap for a kindle) get the hardcopy here.

Imaginary Friends Show vs Westboro Baptist Church

Dear Fag Enablers,

Here is the long awaited interview with Ben Phelps, grandson of Pastor Fred Phelps, the homophobic, anti-Semitic, bigot from the Westboro Baptist “God Hates Fags” church from Topeka, Kansas.

After this interview, I feel sorry for the guy. He’s clearly intelligent and were it not for his indoctrination into such a horribly bigoted cult, he’d be a guy I’d have a beer with… then, you know, like… whatever.

Watch/listen here (wait to load):

Download mp3 here.

Subscribe on iTunes here.

Go masticate in public!


Jake is the author of ‘Letters to Christian Leaders; Hollow be thy claims’, the book which takes the specific claims that the most prominent Christian Leaders make and directly refutes them using the latest research and evidence, reason, logic, and a dash of snarky humour. Get it here for your sexy kindleOr if you prefer the authenticity of a book (and are too cheap for a kindle) get the hardcopy here.

The Evolution of Superstition and Religion

If you take an animal like a bird in it’s nesting phase and provide it with a choice between it’s own eggs and larger plastic eggs with artificially attractive blue polka dots, it is completely unable to refuse the ‘prettier egg’, at the expense of it’s own eggs.

Experiments with butterflies, whereby a painted cardboard tube with more stripes on its underside than a natural butterfly is placed in front of a male butterfly, have shown equally interesting results. Despite the fact that the cardboard tube ha no wings, the male butterfly chose to mate with the cardboard tube instead of the female butterfly.

In contrast, humans are equipped with a massive cerebral cortex which enables us to be sceptical of our environment, it enables us to realise we’re sitting on large blue plastic eggs or trying to mate with a piece of cardboard over one of our own species (except those of our species who purposely buy ‘life-like’ latex or plastic dolls to mate with).

With that said though, while our brains were indeed designed by evolution to be sceptical of our surroundings (i.e. hear a twig break in the savannah and assume it is a lion stalking you in the bushes), this evolutionary advantage also provided us with a significant drawback; religious belief.

Religious belief is simply ‘connecting the dots’ where there are none. Inserting supernatural explanations in the place of natural ones would have made perfect sense when early hominids were trying to survive in a world where everything is trying to eat you.

If one of the flighty members of your tribe came back empty handed from a hunt, had lost his spear and had an open gash on his side and his explanation was that a gigantic new predator had moved in, you were inclined to believe him!

Had one of the elders questioned the flighty hunter, he may have confessed his secret.

You only need to take one more step and have an older, seasoned hunter or elder suggest that he had dreamt that the big beast would attack during the next hunt, and the superstitious belief becomes and exercise in the preservation of the tribe. One hunter might go off after the beast, fall off a cliff, and the tribe will forever tell stories of the ‘great beast’. This is the stuff of myths and superstition.

Due to the fact that our ‘instincts’ are still demonstrably strong, religion is still a most prevalent superstition; as a species, we still continue to ascribe supernatural explanations to our very natural lives.

Religion has convinced us that by living a certain way, we can preserve ourselves with eternal life. The derision of this belief, of course, deserves eternal punishment, pain and torture.

We are however, as mentioned above, equipped with a huge brain which enables us to be sceptical of such things. As we question the various forms of ancient superstition, they will break down and dissolve. Slowly, and carefully, we will evolve beyond our need for such acutely honed ‘instincts’ and ‘gut feelings’ telling us that Satan and the bogey man is lurking around the corner.

Only then evidence based claims take their rightful place.

1 – Professor of Evolutionary Psychology, Deirdre Barrett – “Supernormal Stimuli” 2010.
2 – Professor of Evolutionary Medicine, Dr William Meller M.D. – “Evolution Rx” 2009.

Can you think of the evolutionary stimuli for any other modern dysfuntions?

Free radicals: They are killing you!

Did you know that the free radicals in your body are slowly killing you?

Did you know that free radicals in your body are responsible for your ageing?

“Well, good news everyone; all you have to do is take a single Antiox pill, which is positively packed with life giving antioxidants, and use this specially formulated Antiox skin lotion, and you’ll be back to your twenties in no time at all”… I suppose a coffee enema wouldn’t go astray either, right?

Well, I suppose that technically, they are correct; subjectively, no time at all can easily be interpreted as NEVER!

To quickly give you the low-down, our body oxidises food for energy in the same way that fire burns the cellulose in wood. We do literally burn calories in order to produce energy.

The by-product of the mitochondria within our bodily cells burning this energy is oxidants, otherwise known as free radicals. These little bastards will damage the DNA in EVERY cell of our body about 800 times an hour.

I can hear you positively gasping in incredulity! “What can we do, Jake, what can we do?”

Well, if you want to believe the hour long infomercial that I watched last night (in the form of a current affairs/news show), all you have to do is take an antioxidant tablet once a day and you’re fixed! You’ll increase your lifespan by up to 15%, your skin will look and feel younger and you will be measurably healthier.

The problem with this claim is that it is complete and utter codswallop!

Firstly, while free radicals do indeed damage your cells, our white blood cells also use them to kill the bad bacteria, viruses and fungus that lurk within every cell of our body.

Think about it folks, the very fact that you exist means that every evolutionary incarnation that our ancestors took relied on our ability to hold antioxidants in a state of homeostasis or balance within our fragile forms.

The good news is that food (and sunlight) produces all of the antioxidants that you’ll ever need. So even if you have a terrible diet of KFC and hot dogs, as long as you have the occasional salad, your diet and the sun will produce everything you need to keep antioxidants in check.

The bad news is that antioxidants are toxic! So if you are gullible enough to buy antioxidant pills, you are absolutely ingesting more antioxidants than your body can naturally absorb, and some of these may well bioaccumulation.

A huge study into Carotene and vitamin A for lung cancer protection found that those taking the antioxidants had a much higher incidence of lung cancer and a higher mortality rate! Needless to say, the study closed early.

Other studies have shown that taking antioxidant supplements actually cancel out any of the life extending qualities one might gain from a healthy diet, exercise and not smoking (that’s right)!

Remember kids, extraordinary clams DO require extraordinary evidence!

Allah; God: Overlord of the Paedophiles

I weighed in on a debate running hot in one of the conference rooms near my office today. Apparently there are a number of Christians who have had their faith shaken by the recent spate of paedophilia in various Christian churches.

When I say ‘various Christian churches’, we are talking Protestant and Catholic churches.

The debate it self was between a Baptist and a Catholic. The nosy and opinionated Baptist (they’re all nosy and opinionated) was criticising the guilt-ridden and persecuted Catholic (they’re all guilt-ridden and persecuted) over the fact that the Pope, Benedict XVI, Joseph Ratzinger, or as I call him, J-Ratz, has not admitted any liability and has not accepted any responsibility for abuse cases that he CLEARLY had a hand in.

As the workplace’s “Token-Ecumenical-Atheist”, I felt the need to point out that despite the different denomination, they both believe in the same God. Despite the difference in their respective dogma; despite the religious figureheads they support or follow; if there truly were such a thing as God, then he should have intervened.

“But what of the alleged ‘Free Will’”, quipped the apologetic Baptist.
To which I replied, “where is God?”
They both agreed, “all around us”.

“Well then”, I began, “if God is omnipresent, then He is in the room while a child is being raped by his priests, and yet he does not provide comfort, only absence.

“If God is omnipotent, then he has the power to stop the paedophile priests, but does not so much as lift an ethereal finger.

“If God is omniscient, then He knows that it has happened more than once.”

Wake up and smell the bullshit!


Belief has never stopped a murderer from murdering, a paedophile from raping or a psychopath from torturing, because there is always forgiveness, penitence, or ‘accepting JC as your personal lord and savior’.

Regardless which religion you have chosen to worship under, people within your religion do and have previously committed countless vile, deplorable and abhorrent acts, and your respective God/s have done nothing!

God, Allah, Yahweh, El, Odin, whoever; they’re powerless or gutless.

Clerics and priests claim to speak for God and direct their followers hither and thither aimlessly.

I speak for your God; I speak for Allah; I speak for all of them. They’re saying, “I don’t exist. Dissolve the religious institutions and be good for goodness sake!”

Epicurus’ Paradox.